What Open and her mother have manifested to the world is forgive is practical only it requires effort with persistence or even sacrifice with love. My sentiment for this moving episode in the serial drama is the ones who hurt others with faults or mistakes have to do the most for the amendment, say, they have to be honest and brave to admit the fault or mistake in the first place, then they have to be persevering to ask for forgiveness from the ones whom they have hurt. Additionally, they have to be sincere and truthful to mention the mistake or fault they have made instead of making excuses; glossing over; muddling through; or even escaping, finally they have to promise them they will never do it again and go to do something that can atone for the hurt. It is never an easy task, so please don’t fondly wish forgiveness can be achieved overnight, it is an overtime task with effort and perseverance defying alternatives. The ones who hurt others must make the most effort to atone for the hurt with sincerity and honesty to wait for that day.

As to the hurt ones, they also have to be conscious enough to realize that hate is painful because it embraces the same amount of difficulty as forgiveness, especially when you know such hurt is stemmed from being unloved. Many times, when we cannot offer forgiveness, such a kind of hurt is mostly related to love but not other technical things or reasons. Think of if someone hurt you and you find out the cause is you being unloved, how can you forgive him or her? Having said that, hating or bearing a grudge against a person for life is no less difficult than forgiving them, it is because you will live your life painfully when you find you are not a good person to have hated someone with sometimes bear evil thoughts of wishing him or her death despite, to some extent, you can gain yourself some grounds or reasons for it. Luckily, Open in the case told us she had become an authentic happy person after she forgave her mother, from this point of view, we have reasons and perspectives to acknowledge that forgiveness is not only practical but also magical.

There is one crucial thing that I feel obliged to state here. It is the hurt ones have to honestly tell the ones who hurt them the reason why they hate, honestly tell them they find them unloved in the hurt; it is very crucial to the ones who hurt them to know they feel unloved, it is like Open needs her mother’s love. Open has never preached about her mother’s stupid wrongdoings (indulging herself in loving men regardless of men’s moral conduct), she only blames her for not believing her or loving her (go to the previous post of this title to grab Open’s story if you have missed it).

When we get hurt, we used to preach to the ones who hurt us with moral-related preaching reckless of triggering defense from them when the preaching used to include a lot of judgments saying how bad or weak, they are. If what you need is love, honestly tell them you need their love rather than act like a moralist telling preach rendering them countered. The truth is, deep down, you dare not reveal what you are, you are afraid of appearing embarrassed or exposing weakness if you say to them, you need love, so you pretend strong by striking another path to accuse them of their mistakes or faults with your preaching, it is you are more than vulnerable to reveal your true self. I am glad that Open is not this kind of person, she has never preached about her mother but yearned for her love, and in the course of time, she has not exerted all her time and energy to hate her but reining at the edge of the precipice to forgive her and love her to achieve a happy and meaningful life.

Hate is time and energy-consuming gaining no result but leaving regrets, it is the most worthless and deplorable thing which has ridiculously and relentlessly dominated our human universe that we have to make a vigorous effort to get rid of it. Keep in mind that forgiveness can make us happier people, for such a deed can tell you are good. Beware of hating a person will require utilizing the dark sides of our human nature and doing so will steadily plunge us into an abyss of evilness.

Inevitably, we hurt and be hurt; forgiveness is not exclusive to anyone but everyone. Let us all share the universality of forgiveness – forgiving and being forgiven.